Carolyne Rashford's Blog

My children and I recently returned from a trip to Uganda, East Africa.  The main purpose of the jaunt halfway around the world was to see my mother who returned to my birth county five years ago.  What I did not anticipate were the lessons that we all learned during our stay in Uganda.

We were lucky enough to be hosted by my cousin and her daughter, my mother and my aunt (my cousin’s mother and my mother’s sister) also live in the same house.  I foresaw the trip being a bittersweet experience as my mother has been suffering from dementia for the past several years.  The lessons started as soon as we landed, the airport like in most third world countries was not what they were accustomed to.  There is only one reporting area and technology is definitely lagging, the customs officers welcoming demeanour more than made up for what was lacking.  We made our way out of the airport into the arms of my cousin and niece.  The trip home was full off ‘oohs ‘and ‘aahs ‘as the kids took in their new environment, they were particularly thrown by the boda bodas (motorcycle taxis) that wheezed in and out of traffic seemingly without any safety concerns.  I have to admit even I caught my breath on a few occasions.

When we arrived at the house the first thing I did was find my mother, I looked deep into my mother’s eyes and said ‘hi’ but I could tell she was confused.  I had prepared my children for this very moment by reminding them regularly that their jajja might not remember them but I could see especially in my son’s eyes that he had hoped for a different outcome.  We all went to bed that night completely exhausted from the gruelling journey from Canada.

The next day saw us going into the city running some errands and then finishing off the afternoon at a recreation centre where the kids got some lunch and a swim.  Upon returning home we had a quick dinner and then the kids spent the rest of the evening catching up with my mother.  When it was time for her to go to bed she called my son by his name and said good-night to him.  He walked her to her room and then came back and told me what had happened, he was quite emotional and I was so happy for him.  The next morning I sat outside with my mother as she had her breakfast, at one point she turned to me and told me that the children had grown up a lot since she had last seen them.  I was surprised at how this impacted me.  As the week progressed mom remembered more and more which made the kids and me incredibly happy.  If this was all that had happened I would have been quite satisfied and thought that the trip was a success.  However there was so much more.

One of the other lessons that I hoped the children would gain from the experience was to appreciate how blessed they are.  This was evident to them pretty early on in the trip but the most significant impact came when we volunteered at a local school.  Learning that children had to pay school fees completely shocked the kids, they could not understand how elementary school required fees.  Terra Nova is a wonderful school that was established in a neighbourhood that would otherwise not have a school.  The incredible story behind Terra Nova is that it allows parents to pay their fees as they can, they do not demand the fees all at once which is the usual order of business.  I heard a touching story of a mother who did not have a formal job, she sold her goods on the roadside and this is how she made her money.  She would take money to the school whenever she could, this freedom allowed her to be able to afford her child’s school fees.  The effect of this in my eyes is twofold; the mother feels empowered because she is able to pay for her child’s education, secondly her child’s future is changed because education opens the door to one’s future.

There were so many other lessons that we all learned during our two week visit.  The most significant being that we are all more aware how fortunate we are.  My children came back to Canada understanding that life is measured by more than just material goods.  The most precious and unforgettable moments we experienced were; my mother remembering all of us, volunteering at the school and my children seeing the beauty of Africa through their own eyes.  My trips to Africa always remind me to count my blessings and slow down and live in the moment, this trip was no different.